Texts From Last Night

Last Night in Kansas (913)

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  (913): View more from Kansas

  Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.

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  (913): Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in. http://tfl.nu/xn3x
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  I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.

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  (913): I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better. http://tfl.nu/gf52
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  Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!

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  (913): Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life! http://tfl.nu/nhg0
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  I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture

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  (913): I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture http://tfl.nu/ttvt
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  Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl

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  (913): Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl http://tfl.nu/6ay2
  Replies (6) Good night (514) Bad night (2577)
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  farters have to be the big spoon...

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  (913): farters have to be the big spoon... http://tfl.nu/5j3w
  Replies (6) Good night (585) Bad night (2430) Order T-Shirt
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  This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.

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  (913): This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed. http://tfl.nu/p27o
  Replies (3) Good night (490) Bad night (2399) Order T-Shirt
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  if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad

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  (913): if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad http://tfl.nu/tveg
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  You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl

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  (913): You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl http://tfl.nu/bt6t
  Replies (1) Good night (1092) Bad night (1995) Order T-Shirt
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  Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.

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  (913): Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend. http://tfl.nu/iume
  Replies (4) Good night (643) Bad night (1957) Order T-Shirt
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  The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.

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  (913): The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight. http://tfl.nu/vdus
  Replies (1) Good night (831) Bad night (1919) Order T-Shirt
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  Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...

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  (913): Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen... http://tfl.nu/fq09
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  the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.

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  (913): the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head. http://tfl.nu/5rt7
  Replies (8) Good night (424) Bad night (1854) Order T-Shirt
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  U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.

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  (913): U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that. http://tfl.nu/wlf7
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  It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...

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  (913): It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason... http://tfl.nu/n9s7
  Replies (17) Good night (4849) Bad night (1619) Order T-Shirt