I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.