she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
So is that a yes?
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.