Last Night in Ontario (647)

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"

  (647): View more from Ontario

  I will.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?

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  Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (647): View more from Ontario

  I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car

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  Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (647): View more from Ontario

  I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...

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• (647): View more from Ontario

  you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk

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