Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.