Why do all my exes just become Tom Hanks in Castaway?
That's a fantastic question. And an odd set of criteria to meet if wanting to date you.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he peed in my hair
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.