He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.