she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
Randomize
