do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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