big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
i think i just lost a toe
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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