i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize