Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
How external is "for external use only"?
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
