Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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