Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
