I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
My ass is underappreciated
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
