"it" just moved
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.