He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
