No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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