come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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