so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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