I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
I'm bleeding and have questions
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
