Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Just bought a dildo. Happy first time single in four years Valentine's Day to me
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
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