Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
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