her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.