We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.