i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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