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• (914): View more from New York

  Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  its not stalking. its research.

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• (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.

  (1-610): View more from Pennsylvania

  who'd you have sex with.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews

  (1-203): View more from Connecticut

  Same.

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• (262): View more from Wisconsin

  But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?

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• (252): View more from North Carolina

  You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.

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• (631): View more from New York

  I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am

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• (813): View more from Florida

  I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.

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