Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize