'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
my liver is dry heaving
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Randomize
