My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
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