If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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