Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
