I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
I didn't notice because vodka
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
