The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
