i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
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