They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
