Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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