the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
