There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Randomize
