yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
There's always time for handjobs
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
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