when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
Randomize