So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
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