THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Randomize
