Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize