your thong is hanging out like whoa
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
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