Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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