I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
