We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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