Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
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