I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
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