What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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