she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I have already put on my inside pants.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
