Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
