I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
